where-i-stand

**honesty**nnI was/am *beyond* frustrated with the **Thanx** project. No matter how “motivated” I get about the project at hand, or how much I *want* the thing to be able to function/work (at all), I simply cannot figure out what the hell it is that I am supposed to be doing. Plain and simple. I had good momentum with the project for a long time (not that “momentum” matters – I am doing it for fun (which it isn’t fun anymore, by the way)), but now it is almost like **Thanx** has taken on three separate phases: where I *was* with it for the first five months, then where it was from months 6-12, and where it is Now (and where it has been for the past three months – idle and stuck).nnSo, I’m not sure what I can “do” with it at this point?nnI’m not mad nor disappointed with the stagnation of the project, just really puzzled more than anything else.nnBut, I will keep the VPS going, will keep funding the lease (paying for it), and continue to put credits on the Linode account (which are three different ways of saying the same thing), and see *if* anything strikes me, pops out at me, in terms of *just* how to make it all work together – but I am not gonna wait forever.nnIronically, I think that if I scrapped the **Thanx** Project, that I would (for whatever reason) need some sort of *other* project to take its place – and this is simply not so. I don’t *have* to do web development anymore if I derive zero(0) joy from the hobby. And that is another thing, it *has* become MUCH more of a chore than anything else over the past six+ months with the project.nnSo I’ll put it like this: there are people that DO this stuff, and there are people who ENJOY this stuff, and there are people who ENJOY DOING this stuff – and I am simply not one of those people. Web development has always been a foreign entity to me, and initially I got into it to “have something to do” (with my abundant free time), but *JUST* because something is worth doing for the sake of **productivity**, is not a real tangible selling point (to me) in terms of why I should/shouldn’t be partaking in an activity. I mean, it is fine to be productive (actually, I think it is grossly over-valued, tbh – but people “like” to hustle), but when a thing (ANY thing) starts to make you (me) more miserable than excited – why bother at that point?nn#dev

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