5:00 AM rolls around, and I return home from the laundromat across the courtyard, where I visited the vending machine to fetch a pop and a thing of Hostess Donuts. So, I sit back and enjoy these things, and I await the sun to rise, and the day to start, and for 6:30 to roll around to I can make a jaunt to Schnucks to buy some essential food items for the day.nnAlso, I wrote a brief post on Smol.pub, as well as Midnight.pub, because I haven’t put anything on there in quite some time. Just some words. For word’s sake.nn**a somewhat “paused” world**nnI sometimes feel like the world is *paused*. Like things haven’t slowed down, or tapered off (in terms of events), because of course NOTHING has slowed down/tapered off in the past several years – a global pandemic still lingers on, but is mostly “over with” (though not 100%), the Russia/Ukraine war continues and atrocities happen every day, billionaires are buying up social media sites (when they are not sending themselves into outer space), and the list goes on.nnBut, *I* feel the world has paused for *me*. I am not “in” those things, they are not things that are my responsibility nor do I need to have a special response *to* them. In terms of the virus of COVID-19, I stayed to myself, yet still got both the initial COVID-19 virus, as well as the Delta variant, but got double-vaxxed/boosted in that time, and have done all that I *can* do to protect myself and others, and now I move along. An unavoidable thing in most (in fact ALL) places of the world, and I dealt with what I had to while it was happening, and that’s all there was to it. nnWhat I am referring to, though, in regards to a “paused world” is more in regards to “what is happening” (a Twitter prompt), and the events and happenings out there in the world that some consider “relevant” or “life changing” or (at the very least) culturally impactful. An event, or a rumor, or an announcement, or a “new thing”, or whatever the case – I don’t *see* a lot of that stuff. I have an RSS reader and peruse a bunch of blogs throughout the day, but I do not *seek out* news or media stories from anywhere at any time. And without “friends” (or randoms I see on the Internet – AKA a “following list”) on a social media platform, or an algorithmic expression luring me into a state of shock, fear, panic, rage, and therefore “daring” me to click the link and see what I can get upset about on any given day, I just assume it is “all happening”. Whatever has happened before, it is happening again – somehow, somewhere, with someone, wherever and however – it’s just another occurrence in the modern world.nnSo, GREAT! And awful at the same time :(nnAnd unless a thing (of good or bad nature – hopefully good) is organically happening to (or for!) me, and it is in my immediate surroundings, THEN I can react. THEN I can make a difference. THEN I can have a say. THEN I have a platform of significant sway and altered outcome.nnBut elsewhere, it can’t happen. Hammering out a hot take for someone’s (anyone’s) temporary rage fuel or dopamine delivery won’t change or improve my life. It will just be “another” jumble or words said for someone’s momentary “observance” and then many (sometimes thousands) more things can/will be read and consumed by that same individual or individuals, and everything gets lost in the Internet sauce. nnSo, I’ll stick to me. And live my life as it is – quiet, reserved, and adequate. Yet, completely meaningful, impactful (to me and those around me), and absorb and enjoy what comes of it as it is REALLY happening.nnThanks for reading

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