There is a new blog on R.w.a called "Inpatient", and it is about mental health and this person's experience with being an inpatient at a mental health facility, and the one thing they quoted struck a chord with me. They described how they were told (I guess in so many words) that they:

[have struggled to maintain] “a coherent sense of self and a stable sense of value.”

And that seems to describe me near perfectly! Except the "struggle" and "maintain" part of it - I don't "struggle" with value, I simply don't need/want much (of anything). I don't "maintain" a sense of "self", because everyone (incl me) always changes, all the time.

But then again, a lot of my mental health "issues" (or, my mental state as it has been for the past two+ decades, and will likely always be) is, in my opinion, for the most part, a consequence of (or even a "benefit" of) relatively heavy LSD use as a teenager.

I completely endorse my craziness, as insanity is nothing more than a legal term for those who are "bad" or "criminal" (both of which, I am neither).

But, I found, in the past 10 years or so, that "sane vs insane" is not a relevant discussion anyone should be having - it is confident vs doubtful that one (anyone) should ever worry about. If someone gives themselves a "handicap" in a game of soccer, or a handicap in a foot race - then they can only achieve as much as what they are being put up against (which, again, is a fraction of what is "out there"). So, go where the biggest fish are, I say. If someone wants "gainful employment", or an series of accomplishments of XYZ things (whatever they may be), then go after them, to the best of your ability. And that is precisely where confidence comes in, don't short-change yourself into thinking "well, I need/want this but can only do/accomplish that" - because that is a wholesale defeatist mindset.

Hell, I know this stuff and I don't even "pursue" anything of significance!

Of course, reality comes into play somewhere along the line, too - is so and so in a wheelchair? Is so and so experiencing severe head trauma? Is so and so going through a "small" rough patch? Where does one fall? Gauging this is totally relevant to determine where one's possibilities or/and pitfalls lie. Coming to grips (or even "terms") with that scenario is when one can go from here to there with a sense of "where one is going" and "where one is coming from". Leaving the "default" position of "where do my strengths and weaknesses lie" in a state of unresolved indifference will only "come back to bite you" in the end :/

But, like everything, take this info/advice with a grain of salt - because I am NOT a psychologist, and never attended a single psychology class in my life. I've been in therapy for 15 years, and I have worked on myself (and my UPS and DOWNS and ALL AROUNDS) during all of that time. And I discovered (over time) that no one is anywhere near perfect. And also, that time heals all wounds. And that's all there is.

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